Boston, MA – A new officer with the Boston Police Department is claiming that he has sustained harassment and ridicule from his department; His reasons: He says that he does not have the equipment and tools necessary to do his job. Some of the elements that he requests are a new car, a new computer, and a flexible spending account for various work-related expenses like “Call of Duty” credits, or therapy sessions with his comfy blanket.
The young officer claims that doing his job is too difficult when the conditions do not allow him to bring his maximum potential. “I have been told my whole life that things will always go my way, as long as I dream about them. Well, I dream of a new car and free massages,” said a confident and proud McConnor. The officer, who has been with the department for about eight months, has previously asked that he not be placed in “dangerous” situations and that he be given priority on vacation picks, as he considers his personal time above all else.
Police Blotter Five-O spoke to the young officer’s immediate supervisor, Sgt. M. Murphy, who plainly and loudly stated: “I hate those f****ng millennials. Every time I see them, it makes me wanna hate my kids.” When asked about Officer McConner’s requests, Sgt Murphy said: He can suck a melon thru a straw!!!