New york, NY – During the weekend representatives from the largest media outlets gathered up in New York to assess the impact that fewer police shootings are taking on their ratings. According to transcripts, the heads of news channels like CNN and ABC News found unacceptable that the volume of police-involved shootings has decreased, and that even the ones available don’t have a racial angle to misinterpret and exaggerate.
The spokesman for the meeting, Mr. John Kasich, stated that: “We live off fabricated stories on how the police are always targeting innocent minorities. And it is our job to bring those skewed angles to the public.” Polls have shown that while people are more concerned about other minute things like terrorism and making a living, the media knows best for them and understands that causing racial and social division has been a great thing for this country.
One such organization that doesn’t share the media’s views is the law enforcement community. According to them the fact that the media has failed at causing fabricated racial issues is a good thing, which according to one officer; “It’s probably caused by President Trump, and the media’s thirst to make him look bad.” Police Blotter Five-O spoke to a high ranking media person, who asked to remain anonymous, but told us to “not be too comfortable, for as soon as a white cop kills a black serial criminal, they will make sure to show the criminal as the second coming of MLK.”